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14 August 2005 @ 05:23 am
Comfort [hellmouth_napa]  
""Then, Illyria, you have learned more then you need to know about being human, I dare say. You have admitted to a mistake and done it with sincerity to a person who was there and watched it all unfold. What happened in there was most definitively a rage spell and you, me, Angel, nor the pope would have any control over our respective angers in those environs. It was no more your fault, then it was your fault for taking Fred from the world. It was just a matter of where the circumstances took you."

This world was full of surprises, full of things, and concept that were so complex, and so interestingly painful that I didn't know how to react at certain times. Never did let myself believe that a species could be so intricate and so advance that it would take me this long to fully understand it. And yet I knew I had merely scratched the surface. Everything around me had been a learning experience, everything. And what I found interesting was that as much as human existence was interesting, it was also painful.

However, as complex as everything once, I didn't find myself being discouraged by the setbacks I had encountered. In fact, I found myself wanting to understand more of these feelings. I found myself wanting to explore them more, and come to understand why they made me react the way they did. There was only so much that I could learn from the remnants that Winifred Burkle left behind. I had access to every single memory, thought, and feeling that she had felt, but I couldn't yet grasp its deeper meaning unless I experienced it for myself. Right now they were simple meaningless pictures dancing in the back of my mind, simply waiting to be called forth and explain themselves.

I did feel a immense wave of regret over what I had done back at the diner. I also felt the odd need to be comforted. I didn't know why, but at this particular moment, I didn't feel like questioning it.

I didn't bother to move as I stood in the shower, looking at Wesley. What was I waiting for? For him to speak? He already had... was what he said not considered reassurance? Was I looking for something more?

Before I could form a second thought, I began to get pulled into the hot water and into a kiss. Unexpectedly, all the questions that I had didn't seem to matter at all anymore. All that mattered was him, us, what we had. Was this comfort? I let him take the lead, let him take control for it was what felt best at the moment.

The moment lasted longer than any other moment he and I had shared. Our bodies seemed to melt together as the water continued to pour on to of us, I let my hands wrap gently around him, being careful not to disturb his wound, letting my body press firmly against his. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity our lips were able to pull away and I simply looked at him, looked into his eyes and I found nothing but love in them.

I formed a small smile, and rested my head on his shoulder as the water washed the night's events from us.
Current Mood: calmcalm
spuffy_for_lifespuffy_for_life on September 27th, 2005 07:38 pm (UTC)
random props. i absolutely love your site!! it is soooo pretty and illyria if freakin awesome!! i wish i could do something to my site like this but im stupid. but come by sometime if you would like to be friends. i would like that alot.
Jessie Angel: all alonevoodoobanshee on September 28th, 2005 02:57 am (UTC)
Awwws! Thank you :D

spuffy_for_lifespuffy_for_life on September 28th, 2005 07:12 pm (UTC)
yay! im glad! and your welcome. your site is so awesome!